Before I begin, let me just say this is only my opinion and it’s not meant to be anything other than a light-hearted commentary that with any luck you’ll maybe take on board and throw your support behind. Maybe you’ll be all over it like Barnaby Joyce on a paternity test so that it’s not just me, on my own, standing at the gates of oblivion saying “well, I told youse so”.
The question I’m posing is simply this: “Is Elon Musk – the genius behind the Tesla motor vehicle company – a well-renowned, goofy billionaire scientist or an evil supervillain, hell bent on world domination?”
I believe it’s the latter.
Sure we were all mystified when he sent his Starman crash test dummy into space in a Tesla. Elon won over the hearts and imaginations of billions of earthlings and potentially a couple of dozen lady aliens who thought “this rich Earth geek goes alright”.
But this whole car in space exercise was a ruse, people. It was nothing but well-orchestrated trickery, a distraction, Elon’s running subterfuge so we don’t notice him doing other stuff like, World Domination.
This guy Elon Musk has built cars that not only can drive themselves, but he’s designed them to withstand a chemical or biological weapon attack. Why would you need that? Is Elon planning to kill anyone who doesn’t drive a Tesla? He’s created a stunning personal fleet of rockets that can take off and land again and then take off. All under his control.
He has a mysterious secret base in the Nevada desert – sure it’s no glammo moon base or volcanic lair but that’s coming, I promise you. He even wants to build a state-of-the-art boring machine to bore his way through to the Earth’s core.
I don’t trust the Musk.
And what about his supervillain name? Yep, he’s got that covered too! Elon Musk, Lex Luthor. Elon Musk, Auric Goldfinger. Elon Musk, Hans Gruber. Elon Musk, Hank Scorpio.
In short Elon Musk could be a supervillain. Don’t you see? Let’s recap:
- He owns a space company
- He appears to be saving the world
- He wants to colonise Mars
- His name is Elon Musk.
Don’t get me wrong, he’s fooled the majority; the Elon believers are many. I call them Muskavites. But they are the sheeple. Don’t be the sheeple people. They call Elon a “futurist”, but what’s the other name for that? Oh yeah, that’s right, “supervillain”.
Now you may well think I’m nuttier than a Snickers, but mark my words friends, all Elon needs is a fluffy white cat, a subterranean lair, some friggin‘ sharks with laser beams attached to them and bada-bing bada-boom…(Cue the Dr Evil theme song.)
Supervillain. I’m telling you now, watch his space.